Minimum Safe Distance / MINSAFE

During the Great Hobo Wars of 2344.7, a small group of DERPA scientists discovered that certain frequencies of the light spectrum resulted in less physical damage to individuals and equipment. While criticized for their lack of scientific method and unorthodoxly small sample set, these brave individuals were undeterred. In particular they were able to recreate the experiment’s results within the next month, but unfortunately not the original inebriation levels. This eventually culminated in the formation of the NAGS Corps the following Taco Tuesday.

The sole purpose of the Non-Associated Group Safety Corp was to remind others in industrial, commercial and combat situations that everyone involved needed to verify they were indeed wearing their individual “Safety Armor”. Primarily in high visibility of Yellow, Orange, Pink and other such associated colors, it was firmly believed that less fatalities and injuries were incurred by those who wore such armor or outfits. Therefore, although generally not invited or even wanted in such group endeavors, the NAGers, as they became known as, took great pride in the destruction their unwanted intervention prevented.

During the Sex Boot blockade of 2512.12 a particular group of aggressive NAGers were forcefully removed from a ship via the airlock. This was a dark time, known as the Purge. Many NAGer chapters were forced to go underground, most typically their mother’s basement. And while the self appointed interventionists were no longer allowed to operate in public and their clipboard and hard hat unrestricted access was curtailed, their spirit was not. They continued to operate and push their agenda upon unsuspecting workers and combatants via a new strategy they named “bureaucratic administration.”

Today many, many organizations (at least 3), follow these original pioneers in spirit and practice. This is where Minimum Safe Distance came into existence. While our organization does not solely focus on the safety aspects of the original research work, we do find it is a great way to annoy people. We do however, fully embrace their disregard for the stringency of “accepted” scientific methods of testing and reporting. Preferring the less accepted “shenanigans” method of testing equipment.

If you have a high alcohol tolerance, a smidge of autism and look pretty sharp in Orange, you may have a future among the ELITE of Shenanigan Science at MinSafe! Not a bright future, space is like really, really dark, but a future. Also update your medical records. Good talk.